I wish that I were gay
I’d carry such marvelous cachet
They’d buy my screenplay
Afraid that I would come out of the closet and say
They’re anti-gay
I wish that I were gay
Maybe then I’d understand ballet
I would be so gourmet
I’d get stuffed eating a petite filet
And souffle
Read Armistead Maupin
Listen to Gershwin
Even though he wasn’t gay
I wish that I were gay
Then I could forget all of the foreplay
Do it then walk away
Having sex with women is just so passe
So yesterday
Fucking on a whim
Going to the gym
Look at him - he might be gay