I don't want to paint the picture that we've fallen ass-backwards into any success.
Without hurting myself by patting myself on the back, I have been an absolute grinder when it comes to being a DIY musician.
Lots of bands maybe put out something like 2 or 3 emails when looking for a gig, promoting a show, or trying to plug a new record.
I can out-organize or outwork just about everybody else on my level of anonymity.
We've booked ourselves tours with no demand, and got people to shows.
We've been heavily reviewed and gotten very decent independent- and college-radio for albums that could have easily been ignored.
And I've got scores of spreadsheets, manila envelopes, and postage records to prove it.
Additionally, people have found music in other ways.
Bigfellas songs have gotten into indie docs, another podcast theme, and an unsolicited nomination for the Los Angeles Music Awards, all without me pursuing them or knowing anybody.
So, I guess it works both ways.
Not All Networking Works
I also don't want to give the impression that any and all socializing or networking has led to great things.
Far from it.
Over the years, I've spent money and time at a lot of songwriter and music conferences.
It's put me on better terms with industry people who were total strangers, and now at least I have a very comfortable pitch-my-music status with decision makers.
I also have gotten a lot of silent (polite) rejections from people who had no use for my music, at least at the time.
That's an ego blow for anybody, but less so if you just treat it as part of the process for trying to be a professional.
Along the way, I've had great times at these conferences with my similarly hard-working music friends Sierra West and Spud Davenport, learned a ton, met great music legends like Paul Williams, Lindsey Buckingham, Glen Phillips and Jill Sobule (RIP).
Another thing that could be considered networking is showing up for other musicians shows.
Yes, some nights that feels like jury duty, but it's the right thing to do.
Also, you don't want to be that fucking asshole local musician who just shows up for their sets and arrives 2 minutes before and cuts out 3 minutes after.
Additionally, besides meeting new people it's just great to hear who's doing what in your town.
For somebody who aggressively pursues the chance to pursue more opportunities and meet people in music, I've muscled my way into some meetings with Nashville execs and producers - and a memorable series of meetings and exchanges with a former music exec whose heyday was the 1970s and whose current advice was, "Why don't you make yourself a viral video?"
As comedian Paul F. Tompkins once said about the same situation, "Thanks, grandpa in marketing."
You've Got To Deliver
The important thing is that these opportunities from friends and colleagues are not favors or handouts.
You have to come through for them and get them what they need.
This is their livelihood, often more than yours.
So, when they need a music cue to sound like X, it better sound like X.
Along the same lines, you need to have your shit together.
There are several things that producers need with music - instrumental version of vocal songs, quickly accessible copies of songwriter ownership and clearance, signatures of paid musicians on your tracks, "stems" which are separate recordings of each instrument on the track for mixing purposes.
I can't tell you how many musicians I know that want these breaks but are totally unprepared when it comes to paperwork and getting film or TV producers what they need.
So many of these would-be songwriters and performers say they want to do what it takes but just don't.
In a way, that's good for people like me - they remove themselves from the competition for limited opportunities.
Another thing I think is important to remember is that there really isn't any such thing as your "big break."
Everybody's achievements in climbing the show business ladder happens very incrementally.
Yes, it's exciting when you first appear on TV or have your song on a radio station.
But none of that really changes things for bookings, social media, or sales.
It's the slow grinding and accumulation of mini opportunities instead of one big "game changer."
I've said this often: There is no famous band that we've heard of that just got lucky.
It took years of hard work, sacrifice, unrelenting faith, inventiveness, willingness to eat shit, gigging, writing, to even sniff being a one-hit wonder or an overnight sensation.
Then if that miracle happens, it takes more of the same to even just stay in the industry.
People People
Some of the most successful celebrities I've met can each be described as a "people person."
I saw Tim McGraw work the backstage area of industry people while he was an up-and-coming star and it was incredible to witness.
He remembered people's names, had personal stories like there was an old-school Rolodex in his head.
I've never seen anything like it, other than when I talked to and watched Bill Clinton at the Waldorf-Astoria one time.
If you're an artist and don't feel like you're good at schmoozing, I advise you to do one of two things: Either get good at schmoozing better real quick, or become so good at your craft like Jimi Hendrix to where your talent is literally undeniable.
The former is a lot easier and more likely than the latter.
